What if I told you that you have the power to make someone’s night awesome at nearly every social you attend?
Well, this is me telling you: Yes, you can. At every single event or social you attend, you have the power to make someone’s night amazing. You have the power to turn someone’s experience into something wonderful. You have the power to help someone turn an ‘off’ night into an ‘on’ night.
Best of all: it’s easy to do. It only takes 3 things:
- Your generosity,
- Your willingness to put aside ego, and
- A selfless dance.
Your generosity is your openness to the new. It’s your openness to accept an invitation from that person you’ve never met, or your desire to take that beginner in the corner under your wing. It is your openness to accept positive experiences and energy from the dancers around you.
Your willingness to put aside ego is setting aside your pride. It is when you do not blame your partner for a movement gone wrong. It is when you do not feel slighted when your partner is more of a beginner than you. It is when you do not roll your eyes at their misstep or missed connection.
A selfless dance is when you do not make the dance about you. Instead, it is when you make the dance about lifting your partner up. It is when you set aside your own insecurities and indignant moments to make your partner feel able to conquer the world.
You are best able to make the night of someone who is waiting for their night to be made.
The super-adored social dancer is not waiting for their night to be made by you; their night will be made by someone out of their throng of adoring partners – maybe you, maybe not.
The beginner, sitting in awe and terror, is waiting for their night to be made. They know they have fewer skills to offer – aside from a desire to not let you down. They are waiting for someone like you to make their night.
The dancer giving you attitude is not waiting for their night to be made by you; they are waiting for their night to be made under a very specific set of standards that they don’t anticipate you fulfilling.
The person who is shy or knows no one is waiting for their night to be made. They are waiting for someone to take a chance on their dance, and are deeply hoping that the person will be OK with their dance.
The attendee seeking to pick up that cute dancer is not waiting for their night to be made by your dance; their night will be made by making a successful romantic connection.
The person who is rarely asked to dance is waiting for their night to be made. Maybe they don’t fit the ‘image’ of a dancer, or maybe they don’t look great when they dance. Maybe there is something intangible that drives partners from them. They are waiting for someone like you to make their night (provided that you will not be injured or traumatized by something that they do during a dance.)
You can make a night through words or actions.
You can make a night by complimenting the person. A follow can make another follow’s night through kind words alone – the same is true for leads. You can make a more advanced dancer’s night by telling them what a pleasure the dance was. You can make a beginner’s night by giving them confidence through an honest compliment.
There’s a pro I know who tells literally every follow he dances with that the dance was ‘very good’, and thanks them. The amount of follows I’ve seen with giant smiles plastered on their faces for hours is fantastic. He single-handedly makes all those follows – regardless of level – feel awesome because he says it in such a genuine way. #MakesEveryonesNight
You can also make a great professional’s night by complimenting them on something specific – or even non-dance related. They are people too, and every person I’ve ever met feels great after a genuine compliment.
You can make a night through actions. You can make a beginner’s night by making them dance at a level they never thought they could. You can give that shy person the dance of a lifetime by holding onto them for even one more song than average, showing how much you enjoy dancing with them. You could make someone’s day brighter by giving them the comfortable, connected dance they need.
You can make your friend’s night by giving them the safety and comfort to hone that social dance skill they’re working so hard to improve. You can give that from-another-style-but-knows-how-to-move dancer that awesome, musical, free dance that makes them feel like they actually belong at that social.
You can make someone’s night every time you go to dance. You just have to want to.
Know a dancer who makes people’s nights awesome? Share the article with them, and tag them as someone who #MakesEveryonesNight! (Maybe you’ll even make their day 😉 )
Photo Credit: SV Photography